Ridcully's Travelling Furniture Manufactory

What's it called?  Ridcully's Travelling Furniture Manufactory (or RTFM for short)

What does it do? It brings into being a very comfortable chair, which you can sit on and relax, while enjoying a nice cuppa and a snack.

Where is it? This is one of the new hedge spells that you will find inside the bark-like pages of Pracktical Hedgecrafte tome, in Skund.

What does it require? A sore bum. No, really - it is component free.

What skills do I need? chanting, dancing, conjuring, banishing, charming

Has it worked? A chair should appear in front of you. A successful output looks like this:

You prepare to cast Ridcully's Travelling Furniture Manufactory.

> You clear your throat and declaim a thunderous address to the abstract concept of comfort and ease.

You gesture broadly, describing the concept of an armchair to the listening universe.

You reach out with your will and force the waiting potential into the shape of a comfy armchair.

You sense eldritch creatures from the Dimensions of Endless Discomfort crowding in, and send a tendril of magical influence to banish them.

You project a feeling of welcome and ease, offering the nascent comfy armchair a home in the real world.

A luxurious hawthorn petal white armchair falls out of a hole in the air with a THUMP.

Notes:

Each chair is slightly different. The colours will depend on your order (which means I get different shades of white, mostly), but stuff like wooden material, stuffing, decoration and legs vary randomly. This chair I brought to being looked like this:

This solid wood-framed armchair has been very generously upholstered in hawthorn petal white wool, stuffed with lavender and decorated with brass studs.  The arms are broad enough for a tankard or a tea mug, and the wide-set legs have been carved with marvellous skill into the shape of pig's trotters.

There is nothing on the luxurious hawthorn petal white armchair.

You can only bring one chair at a time into a room, although other wizards can add chairs to yours. You (and others) can also dismiss them, at the cost of some guild points:

dismiss armchair

You get off the luxurious hawthorn petal white armchair and stand up.

With a flicker of your will, you prise open a gateway out of the reality we know.  You twist your tongue around the ancient language of furniture, and tell the luxurious hawthorn petal white armchair "You can go home now".  It shuffles off through the gateway, dissolving once again into pure potential.

A curiosity: if you cast the spell while floating over water, what gets created is actually a duck!

In the water just below and near the docks.  Huge numbers of now silent boats and ships almost block the banks of the river completely and what little space is left is cluttered by floating debris.  Although it isn't as hectic as during the day, roaming sailors and less than legal traders still keep the place busy.  A flimsy layer of ice has formed on the surface, but the constant traffic of ships keeps it very thin.  The silhouette and lights of Ankh Bridge lie a bit off to the east.

It is a very cold autumn prime's night with almost no wind and medium cloud cover.

There are five obvious exits: down, north, east, south and west.

A giant luxurious cloud white rubber duck is floating here.

> 

l duck

This enormous cloud white rubber duck floats comfortably on the water, huge webbed feet dipping low to stabilise the weight it is designed to bear.  The wings have been shaped into a comfortable back rest, and the head bears a noble but playful expression on its beak.

> The giant luxurious cloud white rubber duck is swept west by the current.

Help Information:

Ridcully's Travelling Furniture Manufactory                                                    

Right.  Write that my spell summons a comfy chair. Have you got that?                     

What do you mean more detail?  Alright.  Say you're sitting by a river somewhere, or in a really boring meeting with those hard wooden chairs and your donkey is falling asleep. What you need is a comfy armchair!   So you cast my spell, which is a first order miscellaneous spell, and just like that, you have an armchair.                                                                                                                

When you don't need it any more, you can dismiss it to make sure nobody else sits on it.  

Alright, we're done, what's for elevenses?  What do you mean the little box is still recording?  Don't write that bit.  Turn it off.