Unseen University Postcards - Scholar's Entry

This is one of the many small courtyards, niches, nooks, crannies, and other areas that occupy the frequent architectural faultlines of Unseen University's grounds.  To the east rises the tall brick wall between the University and Sator Square (the home of, or at least the pathway to, the thousands of delights that Ankh-Morpork has to offer) and to the south squats the blankly foreboding wall of the Porters' Lodge.  Since this is the time-hallowed secret path taken to leave the University when the gates are shut, officially the groundskeepers and staff take no notice of it.  Unofficially, Modo mows the grass here every other Thursday and comes around every morning to tidy up the damage caused by overweight wizards falling off the wall.

Unseen University Postcards - Wizard Lanterns

A wizardly brass lantern is hanging on a wall.

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l lantern

Short and stout, with a fanciful cap in the shape of a pointy wizard's hat, this lantern is perhaps not the most efficient of illumination sources, but this pattern has been used in the octangles, courtyards and byways of Unseen University since time immemorial.  A fat white candle sits inside it, waiting for night-time.

Unseen University Postcards - Octangle, The Squilltemper Building

The Squilltemper Building is a large stone building on the south side of the University's main octangle.  Its key has long been lost, and general consensus is that before anyone can even think about replacing the lock, something will have to be done about the possibility of Very Large Spiders.

read plaque

You read the brass plaque:

SQUILLTEMPER BUILDING.

Humanities Department  

Faculty of Musicology  

School of Ancient, Modern, and Even More Modern Languages  

Inflammarius Professorship of Dephlogistication  

All lectures to be held in Room 3B until further notice.

The door to the building is locked, but I got some kindly wizard friends to lockpick it. Unfortunately, there isn't that much to see inside it:

This oak-panelled hallway leads - in theory - into the Squilltemper Building, home to most of the Humanities Department, the Faculty of Musicology, the Inflammarius Professorship of Dephlogistication, and the School of Ancient, Modern, and Even More Modern Languages. In practice, it leads into a giant impenetrable cobweb. The studded oak door to the north looks a little more promising.

Unseen University Postcards - Octangle, The Borogravian Rock Garden

 

Alpine flowers sprawl and clamber across a pile of lichen-encrusted stones and pebbles.  If you wanted to, you could probably grab a stone.

Unseen University Postcards - Octangle, Battlement Balcony

The balcony extends out an indeterminate height above the Octangle.  To be precise, it's always three inches higher than the ladder will reach.  It is in fact unreachable by any means - levitation spells fail, spells of long-distance jumping have humorously tragic results, and on one occasion when a group of students broke a hole in the wall of the Musicology lecture theatre in an attempt to reach it from above, they fell onto the surface of the Ankh.

Unseen University Postcards - The Outdoor Bar

The land is lit up by the eerie light of the full moon.

The central feature of this bar is a tall cabinet wrapping around three of the four sides, with a long sideboard covering the fourth.  Behind them is nothing but sky.  A lush carpet lies underfoot, and several deep chairs are scattered around the platform, each accompanied by a small side table.  The mood is one of sombre yet overpowering opulence.

It is a cool summer prime's night with almost no wind and medium cloud cover.

There are no obvious exits.

The Green Slab box is near the entrance.

Unseen University Postcards - The Lounge House Café

 

Against the western wall stands a small bar, protecting an odd assortment of brass and copper machinery.  Along the other walls are rows of wooden tables and plush chairs.  A small number of faculty members and graduates are milling around.  The whole room is draped from one end to the other in shimmering fabrics of all manner that cover the walls from floor to ceiling.  In the centre of the room is a slightly elevated stage, on which one could stand and give a lecture or recite a bit of poetry.  Really, there are times when there is little difference between the two.  Mounted into the eastern wall is a revolving door.

This place has seen some use of magic.

There are no obvious exits.

A sneaky bartender is standing behind the bar.

An AM Daily box is next to the revolving door and a bulletin board [ 40 notes ] is hanging by the bar.

Unseen University Postcards - The Kitchens

This is the entrance to the bustling kitchen of the Unseen University.  This is the only spot that doesn't seem to be constantly moving.  Around the huge room there are many people working at the various ovens and tables.  Everywhere there are preparations being made for the next big meal.  To the north the kitchen spreads before you and to the south is the door to the corridor.

Unseen University Postcards - The Cellars

 

You are in the middle of the average corridor, which runs north to south.  The floor, walls, and ceiling are cold stone, except for the many wooden doors leading to various and sundry side-rooms.  Periodically, there is a bracket set in the wall, for holding a torch.  Farther south, the corridor ends.  At the north end it turns east.

Unseen University Postcards - Noticeboard and Admissions Office

This particular hallway is cheerful and well-lit.  At one end is a pair of staircases; one going up, and one going down.  The east and south walls have stone archways in them.  A small sign has been mounted next to the noticeboard hanging on the wall.  A large friendly looking door with a brass plate attached to it is north.

Unseen University Postcards - Porter's Lodge

This is a small stone lodge, complete with an authentic thatched roof, where the bledlows of the University spend their time when they're not out chasing misbehaving students across the campus.

Unseen University Postcards - The Cloisters, New Hall

This grassy quadrangle marks the centre of New Hall; together with the cloisters around the sides, it is known as New Court and is the site of a number of the university's demonstration rooms, the doors into which you can see around the edges.  The court is dominated by the squat tower that forms the rimwards-by-turnwise corner of New Hall, while over in a vaguely widdershins direction the Tower of Art can be seen above the upper floors of the court.

Unseen University Postcards - The University Gates, Sator Square

 

This is the western edge of Sator Square before the huge, black gates of Unseen University.  To the north, south and east lie the many stalls of Sator Market, but just here the stalls are lacking, as if the owners are reluctant to be too near the gates.

look gates

The gates of Unseen University are plated with black octiron, one of the few recognisable forms of the old, raw magic that may still be found on the Disc.  Tiny worms of octarine light coruscate across their surface.  Judging by how heavily they have settled into the ground, they seem not to have been closed for quite some time.

They brightly pulse octarine.

Unseen University Postcards - The Library (2)

 

This is somewhere in the Library of Unseen University.  You are in a corner formed by shelves in front of you and to your left.  A strange muttering sound surrounds you, a low murmur like the sound of starlings playing Agatean whispers.  However hard you try, you cannot localise the source - it seems to be coming from everywhere, like the strange violet light that almost illuminates the Library.

Your skin tingles with the discharge of magic and the air feels greasy and tastes of tin.

Unseen University Postcards - The Library

 

This is somewhere in the Library of Unseen University.  You are in an aisle, with shelves to your right and to your left.  The air is dry and feels like it has been boiled in a sock for a thousand years; there is also a sound, right on the edge of hearing, as of falling snow or the rusting of iron.

Your skin tingles with the discharge of magic and the air feels greasy and tastes of tin.

There are two obvious exits: forward and backward.

Unseen University Postcards - Octangle, The Clock Tower

The clock tower at the centre of the courtyard is at least two or three stories high, with a large bell and a clock face at the top.  It is, however, dwarfed by the massive Tower of Art.

Unseen University Postcards - Octangle, Entrance to the Library

The Library towers above here, a large building housing the most powerful books of wizardry found on the Discworld.  Tall wooden doors to the north lead inside.

Unseen University Postcards - The Tower of Art

The Tower of Art stands almost in the centre of Ankh-Morpork.  Over eight hundred feet tall and originally comprising exactly eight thousand, eight hundred and eighty-eight steps, many of which remain attached to the decrepit interior, it is popularly said to be even older than the city itself.  Evidence for this proves scarce, however.

Unseen University Postcards - The Student Lounge

 

This is the student lounge of Unseen University.  It's here that students gather to drink coffee, exchange stories, and do their most important learning.  There are some old chairs with the stuffing coming out, and a beaten up table.

There is one obvious exit: north.

A bulletin board [ 10 notes ] is mounted on one wall.

Unseen University Postcards - The Chapel

Wizards don't find it necessary to believe in gods in the same way that most people don't find it necessary to believe in, say, tables.  They know they're there, but they don't find the need to go about saying "Oh Great Table, without whom we are as naught".  Wizards also don't take chances.  That's why they have a chapel.  There's a large window in the south wall, and a stone archway containing a wooden door is to the north.